Inspiring and Heart Wrenching! An Absolute Must Read!!!!
I have to say that I fell for Kami and Fear of Falling very hard. I've been reading a lot of books like this lately. I just really enjoy the range of emotions stories like this can elicit within me and greatly appreciate stories about people finding happiness after pain, light after dark and redemption. Fear of Falling can proudly stand amongst the best books I've read that deal with these topics. I just want to say that this book is probably not for the faint of heart. It deals with some major subjects such as abuse, child abuse and rape and like the author states, for people who may have experienced these things this book could act as a trigger but I'd urge you to throw caution to the wind on this one and give it a try because I feel that it's message is so much more important than the tough subjects it tackles. And tackle these subjects S.L. Jennings does with a very deft hand. She states that this story was inspired by true events and I can't help but feel that the author has a personal deep knowledge of the subject matter whether she or someone she knows has gone through similar things because Kami and her pain are just too real and too raw. You never once for even a second doubt that her past was horrible. You can feel it in her every thought, every breath and every action she takes. Even when Kami is happy her happiness is tinged with pain. S.L. Jennings does a fantastic job with her characters, allowing us to live within them. To see, feel and touch everything that they do.
Kami is a broken woman. She's tortured, in a lot of pain and doesn't believe in love. She doesn't want love, nor does she really know what love is.
"Daddy's love hurts me. I don't want him to love me anymore."
Kami goes through most of her life going from man to man and always running away if they get too close. Once they utter the L word she runs. She is deathly afraid of love and doesn't believe anyone can love her. She's settled into her life of pain with her two best friends Dom and Angel who both have their own issues but the three of them form a dysfunctional family and they are the only two people she will allow herself to love. And then she meet's Blaine - her scary beautiful man. There is a chemistry between them from the first moment that they meet which was probably one of the hottest scenes I've ever read. As Blaine works his way into her heart Kami does everything she can to push him away and deny herself the love that she deserves.
No matter what my body felt, my head knew that I could never give myself to Blaine. And my heart? It never got a say. It was buried under years of mistrust and apprehension. It had been broken far beyond repair before it ever got the chance to open itself enough to love.
But Blaine's different and slowly Kami feels more than just sexual attraction and those feeling scare her but Blaine is persistent, kind, caring and does everything he can to try and show her that love doesn't have to hurt.
"Because, Kami, when you know, you know. And you don't fight it. You don't deny the inevitable. You free fall because you know there's someone there to catch you on the other side." His face inched closer to mine, close enough for the scent of mint and spice to intoxicate me as his earnest words entranced me. "You don't have to be afraid of falling. Just close your eyes, let go, and know that I'll always be here with arms outstretched ready to catch you."
There is much truth in honesty in Fear of Falling and I can only hope that every woman who has ever suffered from abuse can find their Blaine and allow love back into their lives. This truly is a remarkable book that is not only very well written but also felt very real. You will cry. You will feel anger, frustration and then joy and probably cry some more but it is so worth it. I hope that everyone is able to take the same message I received from this book. To allow yourselves the courage to find love and to be loved because no matter who you are, how broken you might think you are there is always somebody out there who will be willing to help put you back together again. To pick up all those little pieces of your soul and glue them back piece by piece one kiss at a time.